How you can be your own personal growth advisor May 5, 2018
Posted by Dennis Mellersh in personal development ideas.Tags: inspiration, life, personal development ideas, personal growth, personal growth advisor, personal growth program, philosophy, problem-solving, psychology, self-actualization, writing
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One of the reasons that we turn to “experts” for help in our personal growth challenges is because our own thoughts are often colored by anxiety and other emotional baggage, so we seek objectivity in the words of others; but what if there were a way we could remove our encumbering anxiety and emotionalism.
What if we were able, at least some of the time, to provide our own custom personal growth and self-actualization advice?
Actually, we each have this capability but usually don’t consciously realize it.
Even though we all have our own troubles and challenges, I am sure most of us have, at one time or another, given suggestions to help a friend or relative who came to us for advice on dealing with a problem.
And we gave that advice without being weighed down by personal anxiety or emotionalism.
We were able to deal with their problem(s) objectively.
Although it will take some practice and work, the next time a problem comes up, or you are fretting about a current problem, try pretending (so to speak) that you are giving advice on the problem to your friend or relative.
Write your advice down as a number of points, complete with action steps directed towards a solution.
It may be harder to do than it sounds, but this is one way we can begin to examine at least some of the difficulties we face as solvable challenges.
Solvable through our own personal resources.
— Dennis Mellersh
How optimism can sometimes hurt your personal growth May 4, 2018
Posted by Dennis Mellersh in personal development ideas.Tags: achieving goals, Hope, inspiration, life, optimism, personal development ideas, personal growth program, philosophy, positive thinking, psychology, self-actualization, writing
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It would be difficult to explore any particular personal growth program or system without encountering a discussion of optimism, a discussion which will usually extol the need for, and benefits of, optimism; but can optimism have a downside?
The word optimism is derived from the Latin, optimus, meaning the best; and in thinking about this topic further, I found a number of definitions of optimism, one of which is:
“The tendency to take the most hopeful view.” *
That seems like a practical and productive attitude.
Another one, which I think requires more of a fatalism-based belief approach, is:
“The opinion or doctrine that everything is for the best.” *
The latter is more of a reach than taking a “hopeful view”
Regardless of which definition we might prefer, they both appear to be present-time or now-focussed. Whatever is happening, we take either a “hopeful view” or tell ourselves “It is for the best.”
But I think in most cases, our optimism is future-focused and that is where we can get into trouble.
“This is bad, but it will get better.”
Maybe it will and maybe it won’t.
If it doesn’t get better, and we bet on faith that it will get better but don’t take action steps to ensure a positive outcome, we are missing an opportunity in the present to improve the situation.
Alternatively, “This is good and it will continue to be good.”
Again, faith without productive actions will likely disappoint.
Optimism can be a rational and a productive attitudinal foundation for our efforts towards self-actualization and personal improvement, but…
…optimism has to be based on a commitment to action, or it will likely fail to result in positive outcomes.
* Both definitions are from Webster’s Scholastic Dictionary, Airmont Publishing Company, Inc., New York
—Dennis Mellersh
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