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Personal growth: Why can our moods change so much day to day? October 3, 2018

Posted by Dennis Mellersh in Solving Problems.
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For a long time I have been puzzled by, and have sought solutions to the question of why we can be in a strong  “up” mood one day, and  yet on  the very next day we can be “down”, despite the fact that our life circumstances have been identical on both

For example, we can have a serious cash flow problem in our lives and be looking constructively for ways to solve the challenge.

One day the cash problem is perceived as a challenge that can be dealt with on a logical basis and managed successfully.

The next day, the same financial conditions can seem overwhelming and throw us into despair.

Since the circumstances have not changed, the difference in perception is logically the result of changes in our mood, an interpretation suggested by psychologist Richard Carlson. (1)

In addition to the obvious mental and emotional distress, our moods, whether too up or too down, can result in our making bad decisions, based on emotion rather than logic.

So, is there a way we can feel “up” on a consistent basis?

Or, is such an emotional state even possible?

(1) Discussed at length in his book, You Can Be Happy No Matter What.
 
Dennis Mellersh

Personal growth: Misconceptions about dealing with stress February 4, 2018

Posted by Dennis Mellersh in Solving Problems.
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In our efforts to develop our potential through personal development, our approach to dealing with emotional stress might be the exact opposite of what we should be doing.

Dr. Richard Carlson observes that many of us, when faced with a stress-producing situation,actually add to our stress by trying harder and harder to solve the problem or resolve whatever circumstance is causing the stress.

But Dr. Carlson says that instead, we should be temporarily backing off:

“The more intense the feeling [of stress], the greater is the need to slow down or stop whatever we are doing, but, more importantly, what we are thinking about…when we feel stressed, we lose our psychological bearings, wisdom, and common sense…we lose sight of the big picture and often get lost in the details of our problems.” (1)

He compares coping with mental or emotional stress to dealing with the stress of a physical injury. If we sprain our ankle while jogging, for example, the last thing we would think of doing is to try to make the sprain go away by using the ankle even more.

Similarly, in dealing with our stress-inducing challenges, we should take a thought-break and do something that is not stressful and equally important, for the time being, stop trying to more and more effort towards solving the problem.

(1) Richard Carlson, Ph.D. in his book, You Can Be Happy No Matter What, New World Library, Novato, California, 1997

— Dennis Mellersh