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Ego management: Trying to control the future April 2, 2012

Posted by Dennis Mellersh in Ego Management.
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Ego management or controlling our thinking is often difficult when it comes to the past and the future; and probably, controlling our ego in thinking about the future is the toughest.

The future, at least to the ego and our mind, is often filled with “what if’s” and “if only I could…” or less tentatively,  we engage in writing, saying aloud,  or thinking affirmations and make other efforts involving the Law of Attraction which usually are focused on specific outcomes that we desire for the future.

However, there is a big difference on thinking about the future positively, or planning our lives to influence a future with positive possibilities, compared with an attempt by the ego to think that we can actually control the future. We can try but such efforts will more than likely result in disappointment, and possibly psychic harm.

There is an interesting passage in the Tao Te Ching that illustrates this in a few words: “Trying to control the future Is like trying to take the master carpenter’s place. When you handle the master carpenter’s tools, Chances are you’ll hurt your hand.” *

I am not presenting this passage from the Tao from a religious perspective or saying that there is a grand deity controlling our lives and Rather, I am suggesting that if we give in to the ego’s desire to try to over-manage the future we are bound to become frustrated.

There are simply too many variables in the universe in terms of influences and events that can have an effect on our future to think that we can control the future. To appease the ego in its desire to control the future is to give in to delusion.

Planning, goal setting, efforts towards a positive approach to life, and other components of a personal development program, however, are ways to exert influence over our own future without allowing the ego to over-manage our thinking as to what we can realistically control in the future.

To paraphrase a familiar prayer, we need to develop acceptance of the things we cannot change; develop courage to change the things we can; and also develop the wisdom to know the difference between these two sets of circumstances.

* The Tao Te Ching, as interpreted/translated by Stephen Mitchell, published by HarperPerennial, A division of HarperCollins Publishers.

The role of managing the ego in enabling the Law of Attraction and influencing positive personal development March 14, 2012

Posted by Dennis Mellersh in Ego Management.
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In recent years there has been a lot discussion about the dynamics of our minds and our thought processes, or ego management, and the concept that improper channelling of our thoughts can lead to negative results regarding workings of the Law of Attraction.

If we simplify the concepts of managing our ego, controlling our ego, or regarding our ego as a management challenge; and also simplify the concept of the Law of Attracting to stating that positive thoughts attract positive results and negative thoughts produce negative results, it is clear that our ego or simply the workings of our mind can have a definite influence on some outcomes in our lives.

Although the concept of our thoughts or our egos influencing life outcomes is as old as the written word, and is a key component of wisdom writing from ancient times to the present, it is only recently that the idea has been codified with the words the “Law of Attraction.”

There is some thinking that, by taking advantage of the Law of Attraction, if we can only think abundance and not scarcity, for example, then we can attract abundance in our lives. It all seems simple, mystical and magical.

However, many critics of the popular concept of the Law of Attraction note that all the ego management we can muster, and all the positive thoughts we can produce are not enough to solve many of the serious problems we face in our lives, and which the people of the world face in their day-to-day struggles to survive and prosper.

I am not saying that ego management, ego control , mind control, or thought control applied or implemented towards the Law of Attraction does not work, but I do believe that it works differently than the simple and popularized conception of: abundance  thinking = attraction of abundance; or scarcity thinking = attraction of scarcity.

I believe that The Law of Attraction does exist, but in a more complex way than has been popularized, and I also think there should be recognition that there is also a Law of Repelling, or, stated in more familiar terms,  a Law of Non-Attraction.  It is our conscious decisions in managing our mind, our thinking, or our ego that energizes these laws, or principles; coupled with positive actions.

My own experience with the Law of Attraction and my so-called Law of Non-Attraction or “Law of Repelling“ is that if we take positive actions, such as working on specific goals in a program of personal development and start to have success with various components in our personal growth program, we are likely to have a more positive personality. By achieving successes through managing our ego to focus on setting goals and achieving them, we start to recognize additional opportunities for growth and can capitalize on them.

The Law of Attraction might say that we are “attracting” these opportunities, but what is really happening is that we are allowing these opportunities to present themselves to an open, accepting mind, and to an ego that is confident and not fearful of change.

Similarly, if we allow our ego to run rampant with negativity, do not attempt to accomplish any personal growth gaols and thereby create a positive mental attitude, we will not likely  be in a position to recognize opportunities as they manifest, and in effect could say that the Law of Non-Attraction is operating.

As another example, if we are facing significant financial problems and start to manage our ego or mind to begin looking at possible solutions and setting realistic goals to make or save extra money, instead of worrying about our money difficulties, then we are more likely to recognize opportunities in the financial sphere when they present themselves.  Proponents of the everyday interpretation of the Law of Attraction might say we are attracting“ those opportunities.

Conversely, if we focus our ego or mind on scarcity and continuously worry about the bad financial circumstances we are in, we are not likely to be in a position to seize chances to improve our finances when favourable circumstances arise. The negative focus of our ego or mindset is then blinding us to opportunity. Proponents of the usual interpretation of the Law of attraction would say that this is a demonstration of scarcity thinking = scarcity attraction.