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Personal development: Deciding on your goals strategy March 22, 2014

Posted by Dennis Mellersh in Goal Setting and Realization, Leaders in Personal Development.
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In strategizing our personal growth programs, planning and achieving our goals is clearly an important priority.   It’s also a procedure that should be tailored to our individual personality characteristics.

The establishment and execution of our self-improvement goals is not usually a procedure in which one formula or strategy fits all situations, or more importantly, all personalities.

By definition, the concept of personal development is just that – personal; it’s individual. If we fight against the basic nature of our individual ingrained approaches to life, and try to institute an approach or method that is not complimentary, failure in achieving our overall objectives will be a strong possibility.

As Stephen Covey comments in his book First Things First, “Self-awareness prompts us to start where we are – no illusions, no excuses, and helps us to set realistic goals…the ability to set goals that are both realistic and challenging goes a long way to empowering us to create peace and positive growth in our lives.”

If you look at goal planning and execution as a decision process, we are faced with the contradiction between the two maxims:

(1) Look before you leap

(2) He who hesitates is lost

If you are a person who usually carefully plans all of your activities, then (1) would be your inclination.

If you like to do a minimum of planning and “get right into things” then your approach is (2).

The trick is in recognizing those occasions when you may need to adapt your approach and either do more planning, or less planning.

If you base your approach for your goals strategy on someone else’s opinion or personal approach, such as an author writing on “How to achieve Your Goals,” and do not adapt the strategy to your own personality and circumstances, frustration and possible abandonment of your goal(s) could be the result.

Personal time management consultant Alan Lakein recognizes this when discussing how to apply his ideas, such as suggestions on developing a goals strategy, in his book How to Get Control of Your Time and Your Life.

In advising readers, he says, “Pick and choose among the ideas. Recognize that different techniques work for different people, and that there are times when good advice for one person is useless for another. Select the ideas that will benefit you the most, and use them to help you lead a more enjoyable and satisfying life.”


Ego management: Did the Universe make a mistake with the ego? November 9, 2012

Posted by Dennis Mellersh in Ego Management, Leaders in Personal Development.
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With all the attention we give to ego management as being a necessary component of eliminating negative thinking in our personal growth efforts, you have to start to wonder as to what useful purpose the ego might serve.

During a discussion period at an Eckhart Tolle seminar, in fact, a member of the audience asked Tolle the question, “Did the Universe make a mistake with the ego?”

Tolle replied that although the ego “may look insane” to us now, it is actually, from a higher perspective, undergoing  an evolution as we progress as human beings.

He said that at one time we did not have an ego. That was the period in which we were at “oneness with nature.” This period Tolle explained, embodied the myth of the golden age, or as the Old Testament described it, “Paradise”.

The development of language Tolle says marked the beginning of our ability to think thus leading to the “voice in our heads” that we associate with the ego. Tolle says that at first, people thought this voice in their heads was the manifestation of the gods speaking to them.

At some point however, the voice in our head became all pervasive and thus took away people’s sense of their real identity, an identity which was non-ego-based, and rooted in their basic being. Thus, our identity was no longer in the roots of our being and our identity became associated with the voice in our head.

Tolle says that as we work at going beyond this form of the  ego we are going back to the core of our being.

The take-away from Tolle’s discussion would appear to be that certain aspects of the ego were, and still are, necessary for thinking and progress, but for inner peace we need to go beyond the ego as the chattering voice in our head, and do the inner work to discover the peace of knowing our true being.