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Personal growth, self-awareness, work that matters May 7, 2014

Posted by Dennis Mellersh in Concept of personal development, Personal Development Potential.
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In our personal development work we will encounter a lot of information about our immense potential for improvement and the need to have a plan for realizing all that we are capable of.

The hidden danger in this is that, if we are not careful, we may subconsciously make the mistaken assumption that much what we are currently doing with our lives is somehow inadequate.

Our increased self-awareness may actually lead us to believe that we are not doing work or activities that matter.

Well, what we are already doing does in fact matter, even if that work or activity is not fully reflected in the appreciation of and approval of others.

It’s great to be seeking ways to make our work more meaningful, but everything we do does not have to change the world in order to have value.

Our contributions in a variety of roles such as mothers, fathers, sons, daughters, employees, employers, bosses, students – each of these roles has meaning and worth. But too often we interpret a lack of positive feedback from those in our circle of influence as a negative indicator of our contributions.

It’s important for our self-esteem to remember that our work would be missed by those in our circle, if we stopped doing it – regardless of whether we are receiving a constant stream of positive reinforcement.

Speaking of “work that matters”, here is an extreme example of  a vital and responsibility-intense life mission; that of the Pueblo Indians of New Mexico, as related to C.G. Jung in 1924, by one of the Pueblo leaders, Ochwiay Biano:

“We are the people who live on the roof of the world: we are the sons of Father Sun, and with our religion we daily help our Father to go across the sky. We do this not only for ourselves, but for the whole world. If we were to cease practising our religion, in ten years the sun would no longer rise. Then it would be night forever.” (1)

(1) As quoted in Gerhard Wehr’s book, An Illustrated Biography of C.G. Jung, p. 61

Personal growth: Moderation as a path to serenity May 1, 2014

Posted by Dennis Mellersh in Concept of personal development, Goal Setting and Realization.
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A lack of moderation or, more precisely, the presence of excess, in virtually any component of our personal development efforts can turn the positives in our self-improvement into negatives.

Examples:

  • Too much emphasis on meditation can result in a lack of necessary actions needed to achieve goals
  • Too much action, and not enough thought, can produce an undisciplined approach to our plan
  • Over-emphasis of the intellectually abstract can dull our appreciation of the concrete and practical
  • Always insisting on total consistency in our thoughts and actions can make us inflexible
  • Overdoing our search for self-knowledge can make us less empathetic towards others

We are more likely to achieve the results we want if we take a balanced or moderate approach in our efforts towards improvement.

The tendency towards spending too much intellectual and emotional energy (and time) on one particular aspect of our plan or program is often the result of feeling we need to overcompensate for what we perceive to be a negative in a life circumstance, or intellectual and emotional make-up.

Chapter 9 of Lao-tzu’s Tao Te Ching sheds some light on the negative results stemming from a lack of moderation:

Fill your bowl to the brim
and it will spill.
Keep sharpening your knife
and it will blunt.
Chase after money and security
and your heart will never unclench.
Care about people’s approval
and you will be their prisoner.

Do your work, then step back.
The only path to serenity. (1)

(1) The Tao Te Ching, as interpreted/translated by Stephen Mitchell, published by HarperPerennial, A Division of HarperCollins Publishers, 1991