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Positive potential of living in day-tight compartments January 13, 2016

Posted by Dennis Mellersh in Living in the Now.
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By Dennis Mellersh

A common piece of advice from personal development experts is that if we are to fully achieve our personal growth potential we need to live in day-tight compartments.

Stop regretting the past; don’t worry about the future. Live in the “now.”

Unfortunately, not only is this very hard to do, it’s also counterproductive.

Perhaps we can somehow train ourselves to not regret past actions or inactions, and maybe we can will ourselves not to worry about our future concerns.

However, the past and its implications are still there; and the future with its unfolding challenges will arrive.

By trying to (1) forget the problems and regrets about our past and (2) not be concerned about the future we are reducing our ability to manage our lives.

Instead, what we can do today, is to engage in actions that may help to correct some past actions/inactions and also improve our future prospects.

In many cases, we can alter those aspects and consequences of past that are still unfolding and we can also improve upon the developing future.

But, we can only do it within the day-tight compartment we are living in today.

Using the values sieve for personal growth and development March 30, 2015

Posted by Dennis Mellersh in Concept of personal development.
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By Dennis Mellersh

One of the problems many people face when first tackling a largely self-directed program of personal growth is that of being overwhelmed by the sheer scope of what they think may need to be done.

It can all seem to be “too much” to take on if we assume that our entire personality, behavioural characteristics, and general life habits need to be thrown out the window and replaced with the many elements, and/or key principles  of one or more  programs of  self-improvement.

The difficulty results from having an “all or nothing” approach; from thinking that everything we are doing, or not doing, needs to be changed, modified, or improved.

Maybe it does, but not likely.

A better approach is to realize that you can make choices and that you are probably in better mental and emotional shape than you may realize; otherwise you would not perceive the need for making any changes at all in your life.

You already have the self-knowledge and personal values to take a selective approach to decide what you need to do now, what can wait, and what does not need to be done.

It’s like using a sieve, which can be mechanically defined as a utensil for sorting out a mixture of larger particles from finer or smaller particles. Or in archeology, where a large sieve is often used to separate the valuable artifacts from the debris, gravel, and earth on an archeological site.

Similarly, in the case of personal growth prioritizing, you can use an intellectual sieve, based on your self-knowledge, and emotional and intellectual intelligence to separate immediate, short-term, and long terms goals for your personal improvement efforts.

And, to separate what you need to work on from what you don’t need to work on.