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Personal growth: Our past does not equal our future May 20, 2014

Posted by Dennis Mellersh in Concept of personal growth, Living in the Now.
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One of the impediments to effectively implementing our personal growth and development programs can be the way we look at our past, and the attributes we apply to our past behaviour.

The past can be a barrier to forward progress in self-improvement if we look at it through a pessimistic and fatalistic perspective.

We might view the past and its problems as a negative indicator of how things will be in the future.

We might look at our past and fill our minds with regret of what we did or didn’t do.

We might negatively assess our entire personality based on our past.

One conclusion is inescapable; our past behaviour does affect our present and future circumstances.

However, can can’t un-do the past. We can only work in the present to build a positive outcome for the future.

In his book, Notes From a Friend, Tony Robbins makes a significant and carefully worded statement about the past and the future:
“Remember that what you did in the past does not determine what you’ll do in the future.”

In other words, we may not be able to change what we did in the past or its influence on our lives today, but we can change how we will act, what we will do, in the future.

In his comment Robbins is emphasising that behavioural change is possible, that our actions now can positively affect our future; that our past behaviour pattern does not have to be our future behaviour pattern.

We can’t un-ring a bell, but we can ring a new bell.

Positive thinking versus negative thinking.

Personal growth and day-tight compartments April 3, 2014

Posted by Dennis Mellersh in Living in the Now.
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One of the challenges we face after starting a program of personal development is that the increased self-awareness we inevitably create can sometimes lead to discouragement at our perceived lack of quick progress.

When this happens, it can be helpful to try to follow the example of professional athletes who, although facing setbacks and potential failures very day, nevertheless persevere in their efforts to maximize their talents.

If you listen to interviews with professional athletes, their approach to their work usually follows a pattern:

Preparation: They continually prepare for improved performance each day

Focus on today: They try to live in day-tight compartments. Failure yesterday does not mean failure today; rather, today is a new opportunity to do better

Stressing routines: They keep doing the routines that have worked for them in the past and modify them if necessary to achieve better results

Concentration: They focus on the task at hand instead of fretting about missed o0pportunities yesterday, or worrying how they are going to meet challenges tomorrow

Control what can be controlled: They make an effort to concentrate on the elements of their lives that are within their control and try to not worry about the elements that they can’t control